Another lost episode, the recording I have is not a Loose Cannon production, and has insufficent text narration. I’m feeling this isn’t going to be a terribly enjoyable one to watch.

E1 “Temple of Secrets”

 We start with Hector and Achilles fighting, neither of them observing as the TARDIS materialises. I guess they fight on, all I can hear is clanging and grunting and too loud music.

 Inside, The Doctor and his companions are watching the fight. The Doctor decides to go outside and talk to the warriors as they are “doing more talking than fighting.” He tells Steven to stay inside and watch over Vicki and her hurt ankle.

 Hector and Achilles talk. There’s no clanging, so I guess they’re not fighting any more? The Doctor steps out of the TARDIS and distracts Hector, who is run through by Achilles.

 Achilles thinks The Doctor is Zeus. The Doctor plays along. Achilles persuades The Doctor to go to the Greek encampment. Steven and Vicki watch from inside, and Steven goes off to get proper clothing.

 Odysseus approaches Achilles and The Doctor. Odysseus is very impolite to Achilles, even when they show Hector’s corpse. Odysseus laughs when Achilles introduces The Doctor as Zeus.

 Inside the TARDIS, Steven gets ready to go out and help. Vicki gets him a walking stick.

Odysseus’ sailors take The Doctor captive and collect Hector’s body. They set off, mocking Achilles, but he does nothing but watch them depart.

 Inside the TARDIS, Steven and Vicki argue whether The Doctor was taken prisoner or not. Vicki has to stay behind because of her ankle.

 The Greek camp is a short distance from Troy. In the tent of Agamemnon, Menelaus (king of Sparta) is feasting with Agamemnon, and drinking. Slaves and soldiers are in attendance. The king of Sparta is whining that they’ve been there too long. Apparently, the two of them are brothers.

 Achilles walks into the tent, to give the good news of Hector’s death, but this is not taken graciously, as Menelaus had planned to challenge Hector (or rather, Agamemnon had planned for his brother to challenge him) to a duel.

 Achilles tells the kings of the arrival of Zeus, and of his being taken prisoner by Odysseus. Agememnon sends a guard to summon Odysseus.

 Odysseus arrives, The Doctor in tow, and everyone in the tent drops to their knees for “Zeus”. Zeus tries to use his knowledge to prove his godhood, but it doesn’t work.

 Meanwhile, Steven is making his way towards the camp, trying to avoid detection. However, he is being observed by a one eyed man (wearing a patch) from the shadows.

 We see odyssesus and one of his sailors on patrol outside their tent. The one eyed man, who Odysseus refers to as ‘Cyclops’, comes to him to report. He is mute, and somehow communicates with Odysseus (by sign language I presume, though the narration does not tell us.)

 Odysseus confronts of Steven at swordpoint, thinking that he’s killed the guards to avoid capture. He takes Steven to Agamemnon’s tent. The Doctor pretends not to know him, and Steven plays along.

 Two guards bring in Cyclops, who is struggling. Odysseus explains who he is. Odysseus claims that Zeus’ “temple” (the TARDIS) has disappeared. (Not sure where he got that from) and the credits roll.

 So far, it’s not as painful watching as I thought. Let’s hope it continues. (In short, it’s pretty good. There’s some very annoying repetitions, but other than that, decent enough.)

E2 “Small Prophet, Quick Return”

 That’s a great title for the episode.

 The next morning, the Greeks with The Doctor and Steven go to where the TARDIS was, but it is gone and tracks lead to Troy. The Doctor admits that he is not Zeus and Steven is his friend, when challenged to prove himself by killing the “Trojan spy” (Steven).

 Agamemnon leaves, after ordering the deaths of Steven and The Doctor. Odysseus asks who they truly are, but cautions them not to lie to him this time.

 In Troy, the TARDIS is brought before the people. Paris calls for the trumpets and comes before his father, King Priam. They discuss Paris’ lack of success in finding Achilles and getting revenge for his brother Hector’s death. His sister Cassandra claims that it was a trap, that Paris was meant to bring the TARDIS into the city – she had a dream about the Greeks leaving a gift that was brought in and soldiers within attacked.

 Inside the TARDIS, Vicki is watching the scanner and is frantic.

 Steven has finished explaining their story to Odysseus. He seems to believe their story, despite its incredible nature. Odysseus agrees to release them, but only if they agree to help them capture Troy.

 Cassandra watches as the TARDIS is prepared to be set aflame, as they have not been able to enter it. Cassandra calls out to the gods to ask for a sign, and Vicki steps out of the TARDIS. She explains she is from the future. She and Cassandra argue. King Priam intervenes and questions Vicki.

 Priam brusquely sends Paris out to find Achilles and avenge Hector’s death. Cassandra insists that Vicki will bring about doom and disaster.

 Steven and The Doctor discuss how to take Troy – Steven asks about the wooden horse, while The Doctor has shot down the idea as unrealistic. Odysseus arrives, and The Doctor demands her safety as a stipulation. Agamemnon has sent a messenger to ask Odysseus to stand in for Achilles, as Paris has come to challenge him to a duel. Odysseus sends the messenger away, as he will not.

 Steven suggests that he be allowed to be taken prisoner by Paris, so he can gain access to the city and find Vicki. Odysseus agrees to help.

 Steven arrives to answer Paris’ challenge. Steven pretends to stumble and when Paris defeats him, he yields, which startles Paris. He plays up to Paris’ ego.

 Vicki is being wined and dined by King Priam. Paris barges in with his captive. Cassandra is lurking about. Vicki calls him Steven, and Cassandra accuses Vicki of being a Greek spy and orders for their deaths. (Seems to me the king needs to slap his kids around.) The credits roll.

E3 “Death of a Spy”

 Paris and Cassandra argue over what’s going on. Priam is impressed that his son has a spine. “Diomede” (Steven) sings the praises of Paris, much to the surprise of his sister and father.

 “You see, I am treated with more respect than I am my own family.” – Paris

That’s because they don’t know you.” – Cassandra

 Vicki and Steven are taken away by the guards to the dungeon.

 The Doctor is still in the tent, but seems to be doing nothing. Odysseus asks what progress he has made, and The Doctor makes a paper airplane. He proposes making man-sized hang-gliders and catapulting people into the air to fly over the walls. Odysseus has plans to build one and The Doctor will be the first to test it out.

 In the dungeon, Vicki and Steven argue over whose fault it was they got caught. The Cyclops is outside their prison and Steven communicates with them.

 Troilus, Paris’ younger brother (who Vicki is sweet on), arrives and brings her some food.

 The Doctor paces, thinking. Odysseus is frustrated with him. The Doctor switches plans and suggests a giant, wooden horse.

 Troilus and Vicki chat amicably. They’re obviously rather sweet on each other.

She gets mad that he won’t bring Steven any food. He’s jealous of Steven, fearing that he’s a “special friend” of Vicki’s.

 Steven gives her a hard time about Troilus. Vicki muses on how she could be happy here, in time.

 Outside the walls of Troy, Paris and a guard confront the Cyclops, who runs and is shot and killed.

 Elsewhere, the wooden horse has been completed. (Time between scenes is terribly uneven.) Inside the horse, The Doctor has second thoughts about the plan, but Odysseus does not let him depart.

 Troilus brings Vicki news that the war is over, the Greeks have left, and there’s a giant present for them – a wooden horse. Vicki is allowed to leave, but Steven is left behind.

 Odysseus constantly has to remind The Doctor to shut up – the Trojans are outside the horse, and they begin to move it into the city.

 King Priam and Cassandra are awaiting Vicki and Troilus. Priam thinks Vicki is responsible, Cassandra still thinks she’s a spy, or it’s treachery, and Priam tells her to shut up.

 Paris announces he has found the Great Horse of Asia. Cassandra claims it is an omen of disaster. Her brothers tell her to shut up. However, she doesn’t listen. Paris tells her that he’s had instructions to have the horse brought into the city, and credits roll.

E4 “The Horse of Destruction”

 I love the title to this one, too. I imagine it being yelled: HORSE! OF! DESTRUCTION! (Sounds like a beginning to a rap-rock song, huh?)

 Vicki apparently has slipped out while everyone was arguing. Troilus goes to look for her, Cassandra sends an attendant, Katarina, to find Vicki. Meanwhile, Vicki has slipped into the dungeon to free Steven.

 The Doctor and Odysseus argue; the Time Lord whines that had he been given another day, he could have added shock absorbers. The horse is inside the city and now the Greeks must wait.

 Cassandra continues her doom and gloom about the horse. King Priam agrees to a closer look. The crowd outside the horse is very excitable, as the Trojans worship horses.

 Steven and Vicki have left the dungeons and are making their way through the city. Vicki notices they’re being followed. Steven speculates The Doctor is inside the horse. Steven teases her about Troilus, and Vicki gets all emotional.

He tells her to tell Troilus to leave the city, if she cares about him.

 Troilus finds his father and sister as they approach the horse, to report Diomede has left the dungeon. Cassandra accuses her of sorcery, yet again (someone shut her up, please.) The royals leave Katarina with Vicki, who is distraught because she knows what will happen.

 Odysseus and The Doctor argue, yet again, inside the horse. It’s really tiresome. This whole serial is getting on my nerves.

 Vicki asks Troilus to leave the city, using the claim of searching for Diomede as the excuse. He finally agrees.

 Under the cover of night, the Greek fleet returns. Inside the city, the Greeks depart the horse, The Doctor and Odysseus are the last to leave the horse.

 Outside the city, Troilus is searching for Steven, but comes across Achilles. They fight. Achilles wounds Troilus, but Troilus wants to avenge his brother Hector, and fights on. He cuts Achilles down with a savage blow. He says something to Achilles, but you can’t understand it over the score. He strikes Achilles once more, and the Greek is dead.

 The gates to Troy have been opened, the Greeks have invaded. Cassandra says “I told you so”. The Doctor has managed to slip away from Odysseus and reunites with Vicki. Vicki sends Katarina to fetch Steven. She finds Steven, just as he fights off a Trojan warrior, but Steven is injured and exhausted. Katarina helps him get to the TARDIS.

 Chaos reigns in the city, King Priam and Paris have been killed, Cassandra has been taken captive.

 Katarina and Vicki get the injured, almost unconscious Steven inside the TARDIS. Odysseus tries to stop The Doctor, but the Time Lord gets inside the TARDIS and it dematerialises. Odysseus wonders if he was Zeus after all.

 Troilus is heartbroken over his city burning, when he sees Vicki approaching. She explains that she has stayed behind to show him that she didn’t betray him and she hopes he will have her. They kiss and embrace, and Troilus’ cousin Aeneas arrives to help them.

 Inside the TARDIS, Steven’s condition worsens. He keeps calling out for Vicki, worried that the Trojans will kill her. The Doctor explains that she’s okay, she’s with Troilus. Katarina is there with him. She thinks she has died and is going through the beyond.

 “I am not a god.” – The Doctor

 The episode ends with The Doctor very frantic about Steven’s condition.

 A fun episode, outside of too much repetition – Odysseus and The Doctor constantly bickering just got annoying. Cassandra constantly harping was annoying. Priam not having control of his children, annoying. Other than that, it was enjoyable and I’m very, very glad to see Vicki go. There’s no sadness on her departure on my end, I assure you. 

 I find it odd that Katarina was added into the story so suddenly; the first three episodes she was a non-entity, then BOOM, there she is, and now she’s a companion. I wonder if Maureen O’Brien (Vicki) wanted out of the show and they changed the script at the last minute to account for that?

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